Saturday, August 8, 2015

Who has the truth?

Logic is the refuge of those who don't know if they heard from God or not. And I have three words that have taunted me like Joseph's dreams for 14-19 years.
At a preacher's ordination, he stated that he expected to be there for my ordination.
Early in my Pentecostal days, I was given a word that I would be God's voice and His words.
And, after I graduated college, I realized that I had a father's heart and a heart for fathers.

Did I hear from God? I don't know anymore. And after decades of being told I'm something special, I've spent almost that long realizing I'm very ordinary, and in most ways, subpar. And it hurts.

Abraham had a word from God. He spent ten years waiting, then tried to make it happen himself. Disaster ensued. But when God revisited him, telling Abraham that within a year, Sarah would have a child...we have to conclude that at some point, Abraham and Sarah went into their tent and did that which, so many other times, was simply an expression of love (tinged with the frustration of the childless); but at some point in Abraham's 99th year, Isaac was conceived ...

Joseph had a word from God, a dream. And he waited 22 years as a slave, a prisoner, and a premier before seeing it come to pass.

I don't know anymore. And honestly, wading through both the words in my life and the contemporary prophets...I've given up on trying to figure out who's heard from God and who's mistaken pattern or politic for the word of the Almighty, and who needs to re-read the 3rd commandment.

Almost enough to make me a Baptist.

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