Saturday, January 30, 2016

After the hurricane

DISCLAIMER:  I'm not a psychiatrist.  I'm not a mental health expert.  I'm just one blogger with experiences and opinions.  YMMV.  And honestly, this is just a ramble.

How do you tell the difference between clinically depressed and just stressed to one's breaking point?

I don't know.

I think that a lot of what I thought was my depression could more accurately be called poor handling of very stressful situations.

I don't handle failure well.  And a lot of the problems of my personal "great tribulation" were self-inflicted.  A wiser man would've avoided them.

Not only have I made it through hell (or the closest I've ever been to it), but the hell in my mind has decreased to a mostly-manageable regret and self-loathing about the poor choices made in my 20s.  I finally have hope about the future (a combination of trust in a good God who has been there for me, and a reasonable measurement of where I am right now)

So although I've peeked into the abyss...there are people with a different set of problems, whether chemical, biological, financial, relational...God only knows.

I thought that things couldn't get better, only worse.  And from my worst moment...things did get worse before they got better.

But they did get better.

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